Dirty Details of Cancer

No pain meds.

I have been given any all drugs to make this easier, but I have been told that they make me mean. I don’t want to make my boys live in a negative environment so I will not be taking meds anymore.
I know how painful this will be, but it’s not forever. I want my boys to have a positive memory of me.

Haven’t taken anything for pain since Wednesday night. Now just using lidocaine patches and Epsom salt soaks. I also steep goji berries and ginger to make a tea for the pain, but this takes an hour to work.

I just can’t handle making negative memories that make it difficult to have my boys around. I want them to make that choice without scaring them off.

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